Deconstruction

Deconstruction It is the vibration that wakes us.  A shudder that jostles the bed just enough to register in our synapses that something is unusual. We exchange a look, our eyes crusted with sleep and too much binge TV. “Probably a tremor,” you mutter and roll away from me. “Yeah,” I mumble.  However, I’m not Read More …

Expansion

Chords change in exquisite dissonance, then resolve. Rhythms seize breath like a gut punch. Tone, pure resonance, besets the senses Like sex after aimless denial. One forgets… To weep in presence, To die in joy, To scatter in untapped emotion, To question mystery And the ecstasy and agony of the edge.   Copyright © 2016, Ilana Read More …

The Problem With Noodles

The easy part is, well, knowing when to quit, you think after you order lunch for you and the grandkid.  You hand back the menu to the waiter. What’s the hard part? It’s the grief. It’s the knowing you could have, should have done more, but just got in your own way, got all tangled up in the Read More …

The Locket

Out of the mouths of babes or so the saying goes… And there is this child who stands by my knee, me a crumpled ruin on the floor, a child who catches my tears for safe-keeping, who says, “people have their truth but it is not your truth and you have your truth but it is Read More …

Vishudda

“But it’s stuck in my throat!” the child wails and coughs in that exaggerated manner of preschoolers.  She wants to roll her eyes. Resists. Sighs heavily, instead. She knows what is crawling its way up from her child’s throat.  Her head dismisses it as a fit.  Her heart knows the thing is not that dramatic or Read More …

Stars

The problem with pressing your face all day into that little thingy – something they certainly don’t tell you in the fine print – is that it rots out your neck and back. Trust me, you will have a hump of fused vertebrae like a 90-year-old by the time you’re 40. Then even if you wanted Read More …

Wendigo

It is here. Out there in starless cold. Outside the window, see? No! Don’t draw the shade! It already knows. Don’t you hear that? Glass panes rattle under its breath, fouled with decay. It smelled me. From afar, over lake ice and valleys scrubbed of snow by bitter winds sweeping endlessly from the North– It is Read More …

Roads

“Go here or there or there?” the young man asks.   He jabs a finger at the map on his lap. “It seems to me,” the old man begins, “that you have cluttered up that head of yours.” “But which way?” “Which way do you want to go?” “All of them.” “Humph.” The old man takes Read More …

Breath

Breathe in. Breathe out. Don’t worry about the punctuation or the words just let them flow out of the mess of the morning if it truly was a mess it is just the ramblings of a tired woman who ran on the treadmill and feels loose and fit or fitter and there is the beating Read More …

The Dig

The Writer:  Why are you hovering at my desk? IR*:  You’re fifteen minutes late. The Writer:  And? How did you know I was coming back today — IR:  — You’re late is all.  Where’ve you been? The Writer:  You’ve never heard of a thing called privacy? Huh? IR (blank stare) The Writer (sigh, plops down laptop Read More …